on living a true life to yourself

i like this sentence:

"we are told to look for ourselves, and the things we are supposed to do as though we are going to find them under a certain rock on a certain street in a certain city"

i know it hard, many times we don know what we what. sometimes, even though you may think you want this, but after achieving it only to found out that not really it...

i know i'm contradicting my "living a true life"

sour grapes

sour grapes - denial of the desirability of something after one has found out that it cannot be reach or acquired

that the official meaning, or for my case - the jealousy of something after one has found out that SOMEONE else has reach or acquire it...



how often do u eat sour grapes? i don usually, as i believe what is yours is yours. what isn't, if you want it, just work harder for it. no point whining, comparing, complaining..

but today, for a particular incident, its like i sour grape. I supposed to be happy for it, instead i'm here writing and reflecting on it.

Is it prejudice leading to being a sour grape?

how will i tell my story...

you know, life so short, filled with so much great memories..

but we tend to be so forgetful, so tied up at our current moment that we forgotten to treasure the good times, until maybe when we realised its too late..

and i'm a really forgetful person, looking back at my memories, i can only remember this was good, with some very basic details of that moment.

memories like hanging around club hse, chats with club mates, looking forward to friday sport day, HTHT with close friends, bro-ing with my bros, winning a medal in poly50, the occasional drinks, hanging out with friends, and so much more. on top of these, not forgetting the love from my friends, girlfriend and family.

change is the only constant thing in life, and we cant expect things to stay the same. everything here has an expiry. situations changes, 1 of my best bro pass away, people change, priority changes, you never know when you will lose something you have right now.


that why, i firmly believe if the moment feels good, just forget about everything and enjoy the moment fully, you never know if you ever get to re-live that moment..


the question to myself:


how can we better capture all these great moments? i'm not really good at writing and expressing myself.. but i really like the idea of being able to still remember all the good times i had and going to in the future, to be filled with pictures and stories and maybe videos for my own keepsake. just like in the show "how i met your mother" where ted tells every single detail of his story.

-----------------------

i read from a comments that the band filmed this for free, long before they were famous. they did it for friends who loved their music and have not made a dime off the video

you don need a big budget or a wide audience to make great music. 

The head and the heart - rivers and roads

a year from now we'll all be gone

all our friends will move away

and they're going to better places

but our friends will be gone away

nothing is as it has been

and i miss your face like hell

and i guess it's just as well

but i miss your face like hell

been talking bout the way things change

and my family lives in a different state

and if you don't know what to make of this

then we will not relate

so if you don't know what to make of this

then we will not relate

rivers and roads

rivers and roads

rivers 'til i reach you

in overdrive

My mind is in overdrive right now, like 5th gear on a 20km/h road.

 Thinking about everything and anything.

My work, my achievement, my commitment, my friends, my family, my life!

Over the years, I built many many walls, these walls are for protection, but maybe, its time to crumble them down.

Sometimes, I wonder why is my defensive mechanism so strong.